e6thn & crankyIuke
Inspired by automationeer and toastee’s speech
YOU DON’T CARE AND NEITHER DO WE
e6thn and crankyIuke are both announcing their candidacy for Governor and Lieutenant Governor respectively. As will be outlined in this speech, it is their objective to better shape the State of Firestone and improve the lives of everyday citizens and especially our corporate backers and campaign donors.
CANDIDATE BACKGROUND
e6thn, Gubernatorial Candidate
e6thn plays firestone all day long and has lots of experience in political positions within the state of firestone.
Resume
- SCSO DEPUTY
- ORIGINAL PIZZA MANAGER
- FORMER DOT EMPLOYEE
- FORMER DPW EMPLOYEE
- FORMER DOC CORRECTIONAL OFFICER
crankyIuke, Lieutenant Governor Candidate
crankyIuke plays firestone all day long and has lots of experience in political positions within the state of firestone.
Resume
- FORMER SCSO TRAINING SERGENT
- OWNER OF ORIGINAL PIZZA
- FORMER DOC SENIOR CORRECTIONAL OFFICER
CAMPAIGN AGENDA
Executive Branch
- Nominate Cuxle as the next attorney general
- Donate money to FBI Director Bjohn so he can flex on more poor people with his large amount of wealth (he is not rich he is just comfy).
- DPW Deputy Secretary xM_inn will be forced to live in a shed filled with horses.
- Buy back classified information from KingsRarest note selling company to fund private business within the state…
Legislative Branch
- Congress will be required to invoke at least one controversy per week.
- Representatives to be used as living traffic cones during construction projects.
- Should no member have been expelled in a week, a Battle Royal will be hosted to determine which member to remove.
- Requirements for recall will be reduced to a singular annoyed comment in Firestone General.
Crime & Justice
- Give WorriedChris2001 a raise due to his hard work in the criminal investigation service
- Peace Response Team will be established for matters too peaceful for the Crisis Response Team.
- Chrisman022805 to be nominated for Supreme Court Justice. Fun fact, the constitution doesn’t require judges to be attorneys.
- Make Haybill the colonel of FSP because why not?
Foreign Affairs
- MrEmote and TobooRacc to be sold to Somali pirates.
- Sell Spidermanlunchbox to a Rwandan prince due to him stealing the national treasury reserves from the bank (this will help payback the debt)
- Foreign diplomats to be used as hostages in negotiations.
- Attack Ridgeway and say it was Aigio who did it.
County Affairs
- Stapleton County building to be replaced with a monument for Firestone Founder FedoraMasterB98.
- All county officials will be ordered to work in the salt mines else face arrest.
- DiazEdmundo will be the mascot for arborfield.
- Greendale will be sold to private businessman Scriblelz and his wife Coolabrita to start their own city within the state of firestone known as “Greendale”, we wish them luck.
Economy & Businesses
- Make bearzno in charge of commerce because he is the only one who runs a business that hasn’t died yet.
- Allow private militias to run legal businesses in firestone, with Bjohn323 overseeing them.
- Capital gas will have military support if they wish to get oil from any state in the existence of Roblo.
- If a business does not meet the wealth standards, the business will be refinanced and sold to the highest bidder.