OMG, HEY GUYS, IT’S EMMA! I’M RUNNING FOR HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVE! YUP, YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT, I’M GONNA BE THE VOICE OF OUR EQUINE FRIENDS!
NOW, YOU MAY BE THINKING, “EMMA, WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT HORSES?” WELL, LET ME TELL YOU, I MAY NOT BE AN EQUESTRIAN CHAMPION, BUT I’VE WATCHED MY FAIR SHARE OF MY LITTLE PONY, SO I THINK THAT MAKES ME PRETTY QUALIFIED.
BUT ENOUGH ABOUT ME, LET’S TALK ABOUT MY PLATFORM. FIRST OF ALL, I PROMISE TO BRING MORE CARROTS TO THE TABLE. I MEAN, COME ON, WHO DOESN’T LOVE A GOOD CARROT, AM I RIGHT?
SECONDLY, I THINK WE NEED TO ADDRESS THE LACK OF HORSE-FRIENDLY PARKING SPOTS. I MEAN, HAVE YOU EVER TRIED TO PARK A HORSE IN A REGULAR PARKING LOT? IT’S A NIGHTMARE. SO I’M GONNA FIGHT FOR MORE DESIGNATED HORSE PARKING SPOTS!
AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST, I PROMISE TO FIGHT FOR HORSE RIGHTS. THAT’S RIGHT, I’M TALKING ABOUT THE RIGHT TO WEAR HATS! WHY SHOULD HUMAN BEINGS BE THE ONLY ONES WHO GET TO ROCK A FANCY HAT? I SAY LET HORSES WEAR WHATEVER THEY WANT, WHETHER IT’S A COWBOY HAT OR A TIARA!
SO THERE YOU HAVE IT, FOLKS. VOTE FOR EMMA, I MAY NOT KNOW MUCH ABOUT POLITICS OR HORSES, BUT I DO KNOW HOW TO HAVE FUN. AND IF YOU’RE NOT HAVING FUN, WHAT’S THE POINT, AM I RIGHT? #HORSEPOWER #CARROTSFORALL #HATRIGHTS
